Fisting Porn Is Entertainment. Education is Preparation.

For a couple of years, I was a porn creator.

I originally got into creating content because I was curious about it, and honestly, I had no idea how much it would teach me about the broader fisting community. Through porn, I met other creators, sex workers, and people who had been part of this community for years. I made some genuinely great connections, and I'm grateful for a lot of the experiences that came from that period of my life.

It also gave me a much closer look at how people were learning about FF.

And that's where I started noticing a gap.

Porn can be a great way to discover something you're curious about. It can introduce you to different bodies, different styles of play, different people, and even a community you might not have known existed. For me, it was actually one of the ways I found my way deeper into the world of FF.

But eventually I realized that watching something and understanding how to participate in it are two very different things.

Porn is entertainment. It's meant to turn you on, hold your attention, and ultimately help you get off. It can also spark curiosity and introduce you to things you might not have encountered otherwise. But education has a different job. It's there to help you understand what you're getting into and prepare you for the experience itself.

Those goals can overlap, but they aren't the same.

And I don't think that means porn is bad or that people shouldn't learn anything from watching it. I've learned plenty from watching other people, especially when it comes to seeing what's possible and discovering things that sparked my own curiosity.

The problem comes when we start treating what we're watching as a blueprint.

FF can look deceptively simple from the outside. You see what's happening, you see the outcome, and it can be easy to assume that the experience itself is mostly about getting from point A to point B.

But there's a lot happening that a camera doesn't capture.

You’re preparing beforehand, communicating throughout the experience, and learning how your own body responds as you go. You’re figuring out what feels good, when to slow down or change course, and how to respond when things don't unfold the way you expected.

Those are the things I became increasingly interested in.

And they're also the things I didn't see represented as much as I wanted to.

My experience in porn helped me discover the community, but it also made me realize that I wanted something more from the educational side of FF. I wanted to talk about everything that happens beyond what a camera can capture, including the psychological side of the experience and the way people communicate, understand their bodies, and manage the expectations they bring with them.

That's ultimately a big part of why I created The FlareForward Method.

I don't want to take away the curiosity that brings people to porn. If anything, I think curiosity is a wonderful starting point. I just wanted to create more space for the parts of FF that don't always translate through a screen.

Porn can show you what exists, but education can help you understand it. And for me, that's a distinction that matters.

—Danny Mercer